History of Erin Boat

History of Erin Boat
The Unnecessary Backstory (the beginning)

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End of an Era

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But Anyway by Blues Traveler

The Soap Opera continues

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

I've said it before. I've said it a hundred time. But every time I say it, it makes me feel just a little bit better.

It's a soap opera, in every sense. My mothers in rehab, my sister's in a psych ward somewhere, my other sister's in foster care, my dads more-or-less homeless, college is still a question, laundry is awkward, rumors abound!

When I say it like that, it makes it a little easier. A little less..... intense. When I can make light of it, it's all a little easier.

I remember just before the first day of school. It might have been kindergarten, or maybe 1st grade. My dad said "If you wet your pants, just make a joke of it. Laugh it off and it'll all be okay." Being 5 or 6, I was mortified at the thought, offended because he seemed not to trust my bladder control, and a bit confused.

When I was 15, and I chickened out, just before asking my crush out. My best friend, in a misguided attempt to be helpful, asked him for me. He said no. The next day, he asks my other good friend out, through me because she can't get on the computer, and he can't call. She says yes. I'm heartbroken. And I cry, and I try and tell my dad what's wrong, and he LAUGHS. (and I cry harder and curse him in my head)

It wasn't until now that I realize he was teaching me a lesson, both times. The same lesson. Sometimes, laughter fixes it. Sometimes, it makes things a little easier.

So my life is a soap opera. Like a soap opera, it's full of drama that doesn't always make sense in any sort of way. Things might seem to be one way, and the next day, someone comes back from the dead.

Like a soap opera, it just keeps going. As much as I sometimes want to turn off my life story, I can't. It's painful, but you have to watch. I can't do anything to fix these problems I have. Sometimes, I think I should just sever ties with everyone. I can't though. I could, but my brain wont let me. The same way people can't turn off their favorite soap, even when I runs stale. It'll come back, better than ever.

1 comments:

Teri S. said...

It's true, sometimes we just have to laugh. Laugh, or cry. I think I do a lot of both. For you, you're right, your life does seem a bit like a soap, but I'm so proud of all you're accomplishing, even with such a rough family life. I hope you're proud of you, too.
xx
Teri
p.s. sorry for being gone so long! I was on a much needed blogging break, but I'm back now. :)

January 25, 2011 at 4:46 PM

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